Kids...

I found this when I was clicking through old folders. It's about three years old but still applies...

These are NOT for the faint of heart!
In 9 years of being a mom, I think I can honestly say that this one line is applicable to every situation involving my children and the one common thread between them all.
I was all idealism with my first, convinced that he would be my little man. Wouldn't you know that, from the womb even, he only had ears for his father. After his birth, he would cry when I held him and shut up for dad. I tried not to be shattered.
With my second, I was still trying to get the hang of the first. Since she was a girl, she was completely different and it was with her that I realized that "the mother's curse" is real. She acts just like me. In my proud moments, I see her speaking kindly to other children, taking them under her wing and even teaching them to read. On my dark days, I see her crinkle her face in frustration or drop her eyebrows clear down to her chin in anger and (oh the drama) the feeling of being misunderstood.
My third was my little prince. We bonded right away and then he began to walk. He ran from me straight for the open pantry and as I watched him try to sneak gulps of pancake syrup, I realized that first and foremost in his little heart was his tummy.
With my fourth, I was somewhat leery about how she would "turn out". Given my previous experience, the only thing I knew for sure was that she would be just as unpredictable and mind-rattling as the first three. She's four now and, as with all of them, I'm still learning about her.
With all the challenges, though, the highs, the lows and the more-often-than-not-somewhere-in-between times, they stretch my heart to the limit.
Sometimes, I get so frustrated by the choices they've made that I struggle to comprehend the thought precess behind them. (What on earth makes you think it's ok to throw stuff out your window when you're cleaning your room? We live on the fourth floor of a 9 story apartment building!!!)
Other times, they come to me with such hurt on their little faces that my own heart wants to break so that theirs doesn't have to. The mother bear in me surfaces and I know that I would tear anyone who hurt my baby limb from limb. (It's a very good thing I don't see the punk kids who bully them on the playground)
Then there's the laughter...each one has a laugh that is contagious. You hear them laugh that little laugh and it doesn't matter WHAT they're laughing about (the words "fart" and " poop" are frequent favorites)...you laugh too.
The little smiles they give only you and the subtle nuances that only moms catch fill your heart till you want to hug them cause you love them so much (Mom...you're choking me) or just holler to everyone about how great your kid is. And with each one, it's different but the same and always bigger and more than you ever thought you could; and it, amazingly, still all fits inside your heart. You need a strong heart...
These are NOT for the faint of heart.

This Life is not for WIMPS!

I was just thinking today about how much stuff I am responsible for, individually. (I do a lot of thinking...)

• I am a wife and a mother, first and foremost, and those two alone bring enough responsibility to make me shake in my (awesome, high-heeled) boots. It's not easy work and nobody ever tells you that it will make you stretch and grow, whether you want to or not. "Bloom where you're planted" doesn't apply here...it's more like "Come up with the blooms, or else!" (Mom, what's for dinner? Will you sign this? Can I go outside and play? I can't think of a sentence... Honey, where's my thingamabobber?? I put it on the hooyah and it's not there anymore...)
  

• I am a daughter and a sister. These are responsibilities that I wished to be rid of as a youth but am so grateful for as an adult! (many times....my sisters can probably vouch for this...my parents probably just assume it) My sisters are voices of warning and wisdom and comfort when all around me madness ensues. My parents, I found out, really do know a lot! I don't have to follow their rules any more but I'm finding out that there are bits and pieces of them that make sense and I even understand why they made them in the first place! Who would have guessed???
  

• I am a friend. Sometimes, this one is much more fun than any of the others and it's hard not to let it become more important. These women become my "sisters" by default because almost all of them are military wives. When it's the wrong time of day to call a sister, I can always call a "sistah-friend". We can grumble or grouse or eat chips and drink soda and yell at all the kids in the house and be okay with it. We can dig through one another's dirty clothes (and wear what we find!), sew, pin, fit, dance, eat, exercise, stay up late, make crafts, sing, watch movies (chick flicks and stupid, old comedies that people nowadays don't even remember)...it doesn't matter. We understand each other...when they need me I'm there, and vice versa.
  

• I am the Young Women's President - This is a blessing to help me to become who the Lord wants me to be but it's hard sometimes!!! It's amazing to know that He has asked me to be in charge of something that could be run so much better by someone else....like the women who have to work with me! These are amazing women who, even though they are probably better equipped to do what I'm doing, are ok with ME being the leader. They follow me...(please don't get lost, oh please, oh please.....)

I remember thinking about all of this and wondering how on earth I was supposed to do it all successfully. Then I remembered that I can't do it all. I need help. (no big secret there...)
The really amazing part is that Help is available if I ask...divine help...guidance from God...tailored to me and my situation and my frustrations or strengths or weaknesses.
On my own, I'm a wimp. But with HIM, I can do it all!

Trying something new...

So I’ve had this Mac for about a year and just now realized that I have this cool application called iWeb that I can use to create blog pages and stuff without having to be online. Do you know what this means? It MEANS that I don’t have to wait for pages to load or save changes or any of that stupid stuff....I can create it all in iWeb and upload it and be done! (It also means that I can do this blog thing a little more often than once a quarter...) I’m a little slow but I eventually catch the bus.....and that was NOT a commercial.

In other news, I’ve decided to homeschool Stephen and Haley this year because the school they WOULD be going to is horrible. It works for some kids...but I’m not going to wait and see if it works for mine. (I’m not over protective...I’m not, I’m not, I’m not!)

So far, it’s been an interesting process. I am working through a charter school in the area so I do the teaching but THEY do the buying. (This is a good thing.) All the supplies I need, right down to pencils and paper if I want....they pay for. (A little secret about me...if someone else is willing to buy me stuff AND let me choose what I want, I’m all about it!)

It’s been difficult in some areas and easy in others and I’m finding that I’m addicted to things like office supplies, fonts for the computer, printing things, websites that have free stuff to print and pretending to be organized. That’s the fun sort of stuff. Plus, Since have a bunch of money per year per kid (and I haven’t spent it all yet) I keep thinking of things I might want or things I “need” or stuff I want to do. (Another secret about me....money has a tendency to burn a hole in my pocket. In order to save my pants, I must spend the money. It’s not such a good habit...I’m working on it. Right now...I’m working on it with someone else’s money...probably not the best way to do this.)

The harder stuff is not actually the teaching. It’s the practicing patience while I teach. There are things that they do that would never fly in a “real” classroom that seem to occur at home.

But we also get to have lots of fun. The first week we did a review of the parts of speech, just for fun (and to get them used to the idea of doing what I ask) but we used “Jabberwocky” from Lewis Carroll’s book Through the Looking Glass.

We read it and tried to figure out what the nonsense words were, i.e. noun, adjective, verb. Then we replaced the nonsense words with our own words. Here are the results: